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Thinking about my Breakup and Next Steps – Vlog July 03 2016

Thoughts from the walk

Necessary Thoughts
– What healthy habits can I fill my free time with? (Exercise, mediate, write, read.)
– How can I exercise and make piece with the negative emotions surrounding my breakup and past relationships? (Meditate, and do trauma work)

Okay Thoughts
– How have well rounded INTJs worked through breakups in their past? (Like most other people.)
– How can I stay emotionally vulnerable, and not shut the world out
after a breakup? (Practice vulnerability every day.)
– How can I create new relationships with the opposite gender and not
fall into the rebound trap? (Do not rush into another relationship.)
– Find a Bluetooth microphone that will make the background audio more clear. (Phone mic works fine)

Trash Thoughts
– Am I worthy of love? (Yes.)
– Am I attractive enough? (Yes, but not to everyone. People have preferences.)
– Will others love me, or be attracted to me if I do not become
successful by societies standards? (Yes.)

Takeaways:

I’m struggling with feelings of self worth tied to my break up. Reminder “self worth” has nothing to do with other people. Stop giving my ex, and my past relationship power over my emotions. Captivating attention is the greatest power. See these negative thoughts, and then starve them of oxygen. Refuse to give my attention to thoughts that do not serve me.

This week’s takeaways: Week in Review – July 03 – July 09

Reminders:

Success is continuously improving who you are, how you live, how you serve, and how you relate.

Walk Time: 30 min

Transcript:

So I’m kinda struggling through a large transition period in my life right now. Just recently broke up with my fiance of two years and my financial situation could certainly be better. So as you can see right now, I’m on a walk to try to get some good juices flowing and some neurochemicals switching over and everything. This is my first vlog, so I’m totally new to it. When I started actually, there was a hawk that I saw on the lines that was kinda cool. It was a good sign because I was contemplating doing a vlog or even really committing to is. I’m kinda nervous walking by all of these houses and stuff that a, you know, people are going to be judgmental.

I think that’s kind of the theme for today. I’m worried about having other people judge me. Judging myself too harshly. For example today I started thinking about my own self worth and trying that to the relationship I was in because for better or worse, I got a lot of validation out of it. Yeah, that’s just kinda what it is. You know, I kinda come from a rough background, and a bad upbringing. So, it caused me to really face a lot of things I kinda put a nail in the coffin in, perse. There was a lot of growth there but now I’m out of that period where my catalyst for growth is basically – you know my ex – completely removed from my life and I’m not sure whether to make heads of tails of it.

So, I have a – to many people I’m sure it sounds like a dumb question or series of questions but things like, you know, am I lovable?

Can I have people love me if I’m not the success that society expects?

You know, those sorts of things. I’m not really the type of person that allows themselves to feel a lot of emotion in general. I’m kind of in a place now where I want to be able to get through this in a health manner. So, you know, I’m exercising but, also doing some meditation and that sort of stuff to just kinda look through things. You know, I’m sure there’s plenty of people out there that are thinking, well you know this is kinda a standard thing dude. everyone knows how to get through a tough relationship pretty easily. Or, not easily, but everyone goes through it.

If you’re interested in my personality type, it’s INTJ. We’re extremely logical and analytical and not the best with our emotions. So, anyway, I’m rambling here. The idea is I’m trying to force myself into feeling the emotion, even if it’s good or bad and just kind of work through it.

So, if you guys have any tips or advice of how to work through a tough situation. Maybe you’ve been in a similar boat, let me know in the comments below. I’m probably going to include a link to a website that I’m building out, so that we can have a more in-depth discussion on there and we can kinda hopefully weed through the trolls eventually. So, I’m going to finish my walk up, and I hope you guys have a good day.

Creation Issues: Front mounted camera was on left side. Caused the video to display upside down when imported onto the computer. Used Video Rotate & Flip (iPhone) to fix problem.

Change Log:
Changed order of thoughts from ascending quality, to descending quality for the benefit of TL;DR